"If you find yourself in a row boat in the deep waters of life's confusion, just be still. Don't panic. If you do, you'll jump in the water and drown. If you don't, you'll be able to listen. If you listen...you will find an oar!"
If you ever find yourself in a situation where you are intimidated or overwhelmed because you don't have the answers you think you should, don't jump into the deep to find your way out of it. Just calmly listen to what's being said, and the answer you need will come to you --even if the answer is "I don't have the answer right now", or "I'll have to get back to you on that one." If you feel the need to always have the answer, you're not a good listener. If you feel you always have to have the answer, you're one who formulates answers in your head even before the question is asked. If you're thinking of your response while the question is being asked, you're missing the question. If you miss the question you're bound to give the wrong answer, be it in words or meaning!
When being asked a question, take the time to listen. Maybe the person is not asking what you think he/she is asking. Often in a work situation where management and workers are involved, management is looking for much needed information that only those who work on the front lines have, but they may not tell you that. The workers all too often think management is looking to see who did their homework. Such is not always the case. Listen to find out what your supervisor is asking. Is he/she grilling you to find out whether or not you did your homework, or is he/she asking if you have the information he/she needs to take into the next meeting with his/her supervisor? Listen. Listen. LISTEN!
If you don't listen, you're going to panic. If you panic, fear is going to bring in confusion or force you to draw a blank, and in every situation like this, you're going to walk away worried about your job. If you feel you need to always have the answers, you're not going to be able to hear the question asked.
In a scenario involving a husband and a wife: look at the emotion of what's being asked. If he's asking how much money you spent, is it because he knows he's overspent for the month and he's hoping you will be able to balance the budget? Is it because he feels he's about to lose his job and is stressing to the high Heavens but not telling you about it? Fellas, is it really about the socks on the floor? What's really eating at her? Is it really about what's going on in your household or in your relationship, or is she talking to the wrong people again? You'd better watch the in-laws as well we those friends of hers! They like to be all up in your business as they lie about theirs!
And finally, parents, listen to your kids! Listen, Listen, LISTEN!! What are they really asking you? Are they sending out an S.O.S., or are they asking for another one of your long, drawn out stories about your struggle as a kid, or worse yet, your perfection as a person? Are they asking you to pay attention, or are they just acting out? Are they trying to tell you someone is hurting them, or is it really that they just "don't want (you) to be happy"? Are they trying to let you know the new person in your life shows you a halo, but they can see his/her horns from behind, or do "they always act like that when you get a new man/woman in your life"? Is it always about you, or could it possibly be about them? This you will never know unless you learn to put your issues aside for a change and listen to them.
Listen, Listen, LISTEN. You may find that using an oar to help you to coast to safety is a hell of a lot easier than having to tread water to keep from drowning!
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