Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Reality Check


"Woman, thou art loose... 

if you:

 1.  are still in a relationship where you're being verbally, spiritually, mentally or physically abused.
 2.  are giving your hard earned money to your man who you only see around your payday.
 3.  call yourself a believer in God and are in a relationship with a woman.
 4.  are over 25 and still seek your mother's approval.  You're grown now.  Mama ain't going to approve of everything you do.  Some things she doesn't even need to know because you're GROWN now.
 5.  are 30, don't know what you're going to do with your life, and are seeking men to love you as a means of getting your bills paid, but don't see yourself as a prostitute.
 6.  are nearly 30 years old and are still waiting on your man's rap contract or settlement while you pay his bills in the meantime.
 7.  still believe that he's all man; he just has feminine ways and a high pitched voice.  He's GAY!
 8.  think you're just big-boned, knowing you like to eat junk and fried foods all day long while you watch T.V. and talk on the phone.
 9.  are always the one providing the food, money, and transportation when you hang out with your girls, thinking they include you because they care about you!
10.  believe that man when he tells you how horrible a person his ex was and that's why their relationship didn't work.
11.  believe he is over her, just not over what she did to him; that's why he's always talking about her.
12.  are still in a relationship with a man who leaves the room whenever his ex or "co-worker" calls.
13.  believe that your man has a "top-secret job", and that's why you can't know anything about what he does for a living.
14.  want to marry a man who moved in with you and believe he's capable of providing a wonderful life for you, unless it was YOUR choice to not give up YOUR place.
15.  believe that what you and your pastor are doing behind his wife's back is none of her business.  If God is blessing it like the pastor told you, he shouldn't be hiding it from his wife, now should he?
16.  believe the miracle of acting or singing is going to just fall out of the sky one day.  You need to be honing your skills somewhere and you need to be working to pay your bills.  Most actors and singers are starving when they make it.
17.  believe it is ALWAYS someone else's fault when your kid gets into trouble.
18.  believe your kid is not capable of doing anything wrong.  No child is that well behaved
19.  believe your kid doesn't ever lie.  Hell, you did it as a child, and if you believe yours never does, you're doing it as an adult because you're lying to yourself!
20.  believe that anyone believes that you're merely breastfeeding your five year old.  He should have been done with that when he got enough teeth to bite you--and he probably was.  Your sick ass just liked the bite amongst other things!  That "moment" your sharing with that child is a man's work; not a child's.  Just keeping it real!      

And no, I didn't forget the "d" in "loosed".  Read the beginning of the quote up top, then finish it with the second half down below.  The entire quote is in italics.  

...in the head, so you might want to get professional help to tighten you up a little bit!"

No comments:

Post a Comment